Its been way to long

Ok Cindy – get with it! I’ve just set a New Years Resolution – BLOG!!!!! Not for anyone else but for myself. I believe in writing because I believe its good for your soul.

As I reflect as to WHY I haven’t written I am nearly disgusted with myself. When I created my blog I couldn’t wait for the opportunity to express my thoughts in writing. Honestly, I don’t do a lot of things “well”, but I’ve always thought I could express my thoughts on paper well. So why don’t I do it?  I read  so many good blogs and am so inspired by the women (for the most part anyway) that blog regularly. Whether their content is on their children, or motherhood, or challenging themselves, or cooking, or graphic design or photography (actually the list is endless)……people are blogging!

I’m so very proud of my daughter and her efforts to keep up her blog. She blogs regularly and I can hardly wait each morning to get up and see if there is a new post about my grandkids. It’s a delight really.

So with that said, I’m going to try to be better about this in 2011. Actually I have a whole list of things I’d like to be better about – so maybe just maybe this is the year I’ll get my crap together and make them happen.

Totally taken

Tom and Jamie are out of town this weekend so I’m playing Grandma to both grandkids this weekend. Luckily Tom’s dad came down (Grandpa Bob) to share duties. So we each only have one child at a time.

Laken spent the night with me and what a joy. I had an absolute wonderful time with her. After having a joyous night with her I put her to bed and didn’t hear a peep out of her. I finally woke her at 7:15 so she could eat and be taken to daycare.

She woke so happy that it made my heart sing. So we got dressed, made pancakes, did hair, brushed teeth, yada, yada, and had a fun time doing it all.

I brought her into daycare and she started to wrap her little arms around me because she didn’t want me to leave. Talk about tearing a hole in my heart. In fact something I realized almost right then and there is how much I love that little girl. I realized I didn’t want the teachers to take her from me. I wanted to stop time – right then and there. I never wanted that moment to end.

I left the room and from the hallway I could peek in and watch her – and so I stood. I stayed and stayed and stayed and simply couldn’t pull myself away. Truly that little girl has me completely engaged. She warms my heart beyond anything I can describe.

But time marches on and that’s a good thing. So while I’m here at work, attempting to concentrate on work……my heart is with Laken today. I just can’t ever imagine my life without my grandchildren again. 

Our little artist

My little Laken so hard at work - a little artist and enjoying every minute of it.

I know this - nothing is more warming than when that little girl says "Grandma". OMG - I never knew how it felt to be totally wrapped around someone elses finger, but this little girl has me completely. When she calls out "Grandma", or comes running over to give me a "hug and kiss" - I turn into complete mush. I can hardly wait to share with her everything that I love.

Laken truly brings a love to my life that I never knew I could feel. Grandchildren - one of life's greatest blessings, thats for sure!

Ben and Coll’s New Home

Ben and Coll have now officially joined the world of owning their own home. Its in Littleton, Colorado and they are so excited. Its a beautiful home and they will make it even more adorable.

I’ve been out to see the kids 4 times now since they moved to Colorado almost 1 year ago. What an awesome area. I absolutely love it and could move there myself.

These kids are more than embracing Colorado. They are partaking in everything outdoors and everything Colorado has to offer - biking, hiking, backpacking, camping, skiing, white water rafting, golfing, etc. Yet they are both committed and working hard in their careers. I’m so very proud of both of them.

So congratulations Ben and Coll. I’m so excited for next weekend when you get to move in. I can’t wait to come out and see you both again. I love you both sooooo much.

Really No Excuses

Wow! I wish I had an excuse for not taking the time to blog but the real fact is – I don’t. It seems week after week has gone by and I haven’t taken the time to sit down and write. Not that anyone else really cares – but I do.

I believe in journaling, I believe in its therapeutic potential and the opportunity it provides to look within. So I’m attempting to set aside time just once a week to continue my blogging efforts.

My Daughter and Me!

We really have a fun thing going. We're both blogging now and actually neither of can believe we're doing it. Invariably when I read hers, my eyes well up with tears. Sometimes cause I'm amazed how quickly she grew up, sometimes because I'm so proud of her, sometimes because I'm so happy for her but mostly its because of how much I love her. Finally, she gets it too. Now that she's a mom - she truly knows how much a mother loves her children. And it never stops. I love Ben and Jamie and love their spouses (Colleen and Tom) like they were my own as well.

Anyway, Jamie's last post was about how important it is to slow down and enjoy the simple pleasures in life. Wow - she's getting it. Laken is nearly 2 years old now and baby Baylor is almost 4 months. Where does the time go????? It seems like only yesterday I was the young mother caring for two small children very close together in ages. As I look back on those years - I wouldn't have traded even ONE day for something different.

So to you Jamie (and Tom) I want to share a poem that I read when I was young and I still remember it. While I didn't follow it as well as I would have liked......I'm on second chances now. So here it is - I'm trying hard to get it right this time around.

If I Had my Child to Raise Over Again
by Diane Loomans

If I had my child to raise over again
I'd build self-esteem first and the house later
I'd finger paint more and point the finger less
I would do less correcting and more connecting
I'd take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars
I'd do more hugging and less tugging
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often
I would be firm less often and affirm much more
I'd model less about the love of power
And more about the power of love

Sweet Baby Baylor

Geez where does a Grandmother start?

I look at Baylor and see nothing but innocence. I see such a happy, sweet little boy that is so loved by all those around him……his mom, dad, sister, aunts, uncles and grandparents! He’s just beginning to show his little laugh that is totally contagious….you can’t help but laugh when he gets going. He’s just perfect – in everyway and I totally adore him. He’s getting stronger and stronger everyday and I’m so very proud of him.

Next I see all the fun things my daughter and her family have ahead of them. Oh the joys of parenting. Its exhausting, trying, difficult yet at the same time – the most rewarding role of a lifetime. I’m so excited for Jamie and Tom as they are now off and running in their roles as parents. And they are both wonderful at that job.

So baby Baylor, you are one very lucky boy to have born into such a wonderful family. All the things you will learn, places you will visit, things you will experience. I’m excited to be a part of your life too. I hope the word “Grandma” will bring as much joy as it did to my children while they were growing up. Because so far – Grandparenting…….while sometimes exhausting – is still even more rewarding as parenting! Now thats a perfect scenario of “second chances”.

Laken Jane – One in a million!

Here is my adorable granddaughter, Laken! She is my heart and soul and I love her more than words can describe. She has me completely wrapped around her finger……and I couldn’t be happier about it.

This little girl brings so much happy and joy to my life and she is cute beyond words. Never have I seen a more animated, happy go lucky child as Laken. Sometimes I just sit back and watch her with wonderment as she goes about her tasks at hand.

Laken has a way of pulling you into her world. She can totally take over a room – whether its other children or a room full of adults. While we know better than to allow her to be the center of attention – somehow she just takes over with her antics. Whether its her highly animated facial expressions or her need to break out dancing with every song she hears (even TV commercial jingles) or the funny things she says as she’s learning to talk. Truly she is a miracle and a joy to have in my life. While she wasn’t wild about building a snowman, she liked the end results of having a new found friend. There she sat, all by herself in the front yard “loving” the snowman.

How lucky am I to have a grandchild that is precious beyond words. While I look forward to all the things we will do together down the road, I’d like to freeze her right now at this stage – because right now……she’s PERFECT!!!!

Life’s Passings

Last week was a little sad yet eye opening at the same time. The mother of my very dear friend passed away last week. While she was 91 years old and was more than ready to cross over, her passing brought such sadness and a finality to her life.

I didn’t know this woman long but from what i can tell – she touched many, many lives with love and kindness and was a true servant to others. It occurred to me that without her, none of those lives would be the same. She not only gave, loved, contributed to so many but for some, she helped to shape their lives and ways of thinking.

As we go through life I think its important to remember that we never really know who’s life we are going to touch…and in what way. We may not know who or how or why – but the fact is we will make a difference to others. Some of us will touch and make a difference in many people’s lives, and some of us just a few. Quantity really doesn’t matter – but quality does.

As we walk this life journey, we never know how or when it will end and we surely will never know how many lives we will touch along the way. I hope I touch many people in a positive way.

Second Chance Now

I can’t believe I’ve joined the world of blogging but I have. I've always loved to put my thoughts in writing so this will be a good opportunity to do just that.

This past year has brought about more changes in my life than I could have ever imagined. It has been filled with so many emotions – more than I care to remember or certainly experience again.

I have so many good memories of my life so far and more than anything I have no regrets. That being said, I am also looking forward to some second chances now! Whether those second chances are geared toward marriage, children, grandchildren, jobs, or simple everyday joys in life – I’m gonna work really hard at getting it right this time.

Life is funny sometimes – maybe unfair, maybe a little messy, maybe unpredictable. But I do know this…..Life is good. Its meant to be enjoyed and sometimes we just never know what is coming our way. Our job…..is to be the best we can be through it all. Sometimes that’s easier said than done, that’s for certain.

At the center of my world right now are my grandchildren. Truly……we are given second chances at parenting with those adorable little hearts. Everything you wished you would have done or could have the chance to do better – now’s the time. So here’s to grandchildren and here’s to living for a second chance now.